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3 Steps to Build Your Confidence

If you’ve ever second-guessed yourself about your look, appearance, or skills, this post is for you. I’m going to share my top tips to help you overcome beliefs that hold you back from achieving your goals and teach you techniques to help you feel good about yourself.

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If you’ve ever second-guessed yourself about your look, appearance, or skills, this post is for you. I’m going to share my top tips to help you overcome beliefs that hold you back from achieving your goals and teach you techniques to help you feel good about yourself.

What I’ve observed throughout my career is that when our confidence comes from within, it really allows us the freedom to live a life without judgments, people-pleasing, or second-guessing ourselves. Self-confidence can have a powerful effect on your overall well-being. It is a state of mind in which you accept and trust yourself and your abilities. You understand your strengths and weaknesses, and you accept criticism as well as a compliment without getting defensive. If you’re interested to learn more about how to look and feel your best, go check out my courses.

Here are my 3 steps to build your confidence from within:

Step no 1: Find your passion

We tend to compare ourselves to others, rather than focusing on what makes us special. The thing is, that every time we compare our weaknesses to the strengths of others, we undermine our self-esteem. So what should we do instead? Focus on something that you’re good at, you’re passionate about, or your special talent. It will instantly make you feel good about yourself. It will bring out your energy.

Take the pressure off that you need to become better at this or that. Focus on your strengths instead. Whether at work, at home, or in your community, do more of the things that bring out the natural, creative and positive sides of you and use this energy to help you overcome and deal with tasks you might not be that good at.

I’ll give you an example. Before I published my first video, I struggled so much: what if my English is not good enough, what if my accent sounds weird or people won’t understand what I’m saying? I was comparing myself to other YouTubers whose language was perfect. Did that stop me from producing that video? NO. I was aware of my strengths and passions, and I focused on the content and what I had to say, rather than how I’d say it. I used the energy from the areas I felt confident to overcome my weaknesses elsewhere. If you’re not sure what your passion is, try to answer these questions:

  • What would you enjoy doing, all day, every day, even if you weren’t paid for it?

  • What, when you do it, makes you lose track of time.

  • What feels easy and natural to you, but difficult to others

That is your passion!

Step no 2: Like yourself

We are all human beings and we make mistakes. The important thing is to learn from your mistakes, and to admit that you don’t have all the answers because you don’t. No one does. Your self-esteem will greatly benefit if you’re not having this pressing feeling that you need to be right and know all the answers at all times. You don’t have to please everyone. Be kind to others. But learn to be kind to yourself first. Whenever it feels too difficult, remember that your job is to like yourself. I admit it sounds a little cheesy, but it really works. You will see that the value you give yourself is going to be the value others reflect back to you. Respect yourself for what you’ve achieved, what you went through in life, what person you’ve become. This will almost instantly signal to everyone around you that you are worth it and that you deserve respect back.

Step 3: Surround yourself with positive people

The people we surround ourselves with have a great power to either lift or lower our mood, right? They can either help us to become the best version of ourselves or discourage us from achieving our goals. I’m speaking from my experience, as I’ve been through major career changes a few times in my life.

When I was offered the role of Head of Protocol, there were people, my friends, who said that I wasn’t good enough yet. That wasn’t experienced enough yet. And I’m so glad I didn’t listen to them. The best thing to do, and I know it may seem harsh, is to cut those people off. Maybe not entirely, maybe just for the time you need to get where you want to, or until you get things done. Surround yourself with positive people that can help you feel more at ease and confident. We all need people in our lives who genuinely believe in us, who remind us of our special talents, our strengths, things we’re good at, and even challenge us to become a better version of ourselves.


Identify your limiting beliefs, and change them into unlimiting instead. Limiting beliefs are the thoughts we have that hold us back, such as I’m not good enough for the job I want. I’m not pretty enough etc. They may come from our past experiences. They may be based on something other people have told us. Everyone has them. Whenever I have this negative self-talk. I consciously try to turn it into something positive. So instead of saying I’m not good enough to put myself out there, I tell myself: I’m perfectly enough to do this! Changing the way you talk to yourself is a big part of increased self-esteem.

I hope these steps will help you on your journey to become more confident and allow you to realise that you’re perfect as you are. Your job is to like yourself, find your own passion and energy. It’s about recognising where you feel secure and powerful and then using that power to overcome your insecurities elsewhere. So open yourself up and listen or even write down what comes through. If you want more tips on how to improve your confidence and first impression, check out my classes. For more personalised help, I’m also available for 1-on-1 sessions.

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